hush

2007-06-01T03:40:00.001+08:00

1. 11-in-1.blogspot.com

2. tearthatdressup.blogspot.com

2007-03-12T17:50:00.000+08:00

i'm cuddling close,
to blankets and sheets,
and i am alone,
in my defeat

this blog has been closed for the time being.

2007-03-09T00:07:00.000+08:00

dearest friends,

http://11-in-1.blogspot.com

the user's ilovetheclique, @hotmail.com, msg me for the password

2007-03-07T23:49:00.000+08:00

you know, i always thought bonus points were extra points that would help you and not, kill you.

literally.

2007-03-07T23:00:00.000+08:00

So paint your face up something elegant,
And this town may be a darker shade of red.
'Cause a long night,
Means a fist fight,
Against your pillow and my pearly whites.
I want to hear you scream.
Yu'd like me better on my knees.
So let us pray.
(We don't believe in second chances.)
So let us pray.

Well cross my heart and hope to,
I'm lying just to keep you here.
So reckless, (So reckless.),
So thoughtless, (So thoughtless.)
So careless, I could care less.
Well cross my heart and hope to,
I'm lying just to keep you here.
(So reckless.)
Well she's so heartless,
And I could care less.

tonight won't make a difference
well tonight won't make a difference

this glass house, is burning down.

2007-03-04T21:52:00.000+08:00

I HATE IT WHEN I'M SICK
I HATE IT WHEN I SOUND LIKE A TOAD
I HATE IT WHEN I CAN'T BREATHE
I HATE IT WHEN I HAVE TO GO TO SCHOOL
I HATE IT WHEN I FEEL LIKE SHIT
I HATE IT WHEN I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I HATE IT WHEN THINGS DON'T GO SMOOTHLY
I HATE IT WHEN I GET HEADACHES
I HATE IT WHEN I FORGET TO FEED MY FISHES
I HATE IT WHEN I'M TOO LAZY TO REPACK MY ROOM
I HATE IT WHEN I CAN'T BE BOTHRED WITH ANYTHING
I HATE IT WHEN I FEEL LIKE BEING ALONE
I HATE IT WHEN THE WRONG SONGS PLAY
I HATE IT WHEN I CAN'T FIND MY JACKETS
I HATE IT WHEN I RUN OUT OF STREPSILS
I HATE STUCK UP BITCHES
I HATE ASSHOLES WHO THINK THEY'RE SO DAMN FINE
I HATE IT WHEN I'M TOO LAZY TO GET OUT OF THE SHOWER
I HATE IT WHEN I'M TOO LAZY TO SHOWER
I HATE IT WHEN I'M TOO LAZY TO CLIMB UP THE STAIRS
I HATE IT WHEN I FEEL LIKE I'VE PUT ON WEIGHT
I HATE IT WHEN I HAVE TO CHANGE SCHOOLS
I HATE WAITING FOR RESULTS
I HATE IT WHEN I CAN'T SATISFY MY RASPBERRY SORBET CRAVINGS
I HATE IT WHEN I DON'T HAVE MY BLACK PILLOW COVERS
I HATE IT WHEN I FORGET TO SWITCH OFF MY LAPTOP
I HATE IT WHEN THERE'S A LONG QUEUE AT CANDY EMPIRE
I HATE IT WHEN I CAN'T FIND ATM MACHINES
I HATE IT WHEN I LOSE THINGS
I HATE IT WHEN I HATE MY HAIR
I HATE TIME OF THE MONTHS
I HATE READING
I HATE GP
I HATE MY CHEM LECTURER
I HATE ROACHES
I HATE IT WHEN MY BONES ACHE
I HATE IT WHEN MY EYES ARE TIRED
I HATE THE FACT THAT LENSES ARE SO TIRING
I HATE IT WHEN I HAVE TO GET UP AT 6 FOR SCHOOL
I HATE IT WHEN I HAVE TO RUSH
I HATE HOMEWORK
I HATE DIRECT PEOPLE
I HATE DRAINS
I HATE IT WHEN I CAN'T FIND MY IPOD
I HATE IT WHEN MY MUMS IN A BAD MOOD
I HATE IT WHEN I HAVE GASTRIC
I HATE IT WHEN I FEEL LIKE CHANGING MY LAYOUT
I HATE IT WHEN MY NAIL POLISH SCRAPES OFF
I HATE IT WHEN IT RAINS SO DAMN MUCH
I HATE IT WHEN TRAINS ARE CROWDED
I HATE PAPAYAS
I HATE PAPAYAS
I HATE PAPAYAS
I HATE PAPAYAS
I HATE PAPAYAS
I HATE PAPAYAS
I HATE PAPAYAS
I HATE PAPAYAS
I HATE PAPAYAS
I HATE PAPAYAS
I HATE PAPAYAS
I HATE PAPAYAS
I HATE PAPAYAS
I HATE PAPAYAS
I HATE PAPAYAS
I HATE PAPAYAS
I HATE PAPAYAS
I HATE PAPAYAS
I HATE PAPAYAS
I HATE PAPAYAS
I HATE IT WHEN I DON'T FEEL LIKE PLAYING GUITAR
I HATE DRINKING WATER
I HATE IT WHEN I CRY
I HATE IT WHEN I STONE
I HATE IT WHEN I FEEL DUMB
I HATE MOSQUITOES A LOT
I HATE SORE EYES
I HATE SLIPPERY FLOORS
I HATE SWEET WRAPPERS
I HATE IT WHEN COINS ADD WEIGHT TO MY WALLET
I HATE IT WHEN PEOPLE CRACK THEIR KNUCKLES
I HATE IT WHEN EAR HOLES BLEED

I HATE IT WHEN I CAN'T PLAY THE PIANO AFTER 9PM

I HATE IT WHEN I FORGET SONG TITLES

I HATE IT SO MUCH WHEN I CAN'T GET CABS

I HATE IT WHEN MY COMP CRASHES

I HATE IT WHEN I GET BLISTERS

I HATE IT WHEN I'M TOO LAZY TO READ THE NEWSPAPERS

I HATE MOLES

I HATE BLEMISHES

I HATE IT WHEN I TRIP OVER THINGS

I HATE IT WHEN I GET FRONT ROW MOVIE TICKETS

I HATE IT WHEN IT'S COLD AND I'M JACKETLESS

I HATE IT WHEN I HAVE TO PUT LEAD INTO MY PENCIL

I HATE IT WHEN MY ERASER DROPS ONTO THE FLOOR

I HATE IT WHEN PEOPLE GO OVERSEAS

I HATE GOODBYES

I HATE MEANINGLESS SONGS

I HATE IT WHEN I'M IN SUCH A FOUL MOOD.

THIS POST WAS PURELY FOR RANTING OR RATHER, IT WAS A WEAK ATTEMPT TO MAKE MYSELF FEEL BETTER ABOUT, GOD KNOWS WHAT.

i like durians

2007-03-01T23:29:00.000+08:00

hahaha this thing totally cracked me up, watch this if you're feeling sad! haha this is for all fellow taking back sunday lovers (those who would know the lyrics of makedamnsure by heart). have a great night :)

the real lyrics for the song:

You've got this new head filled up with smoke.
I got my veins all tangled close,
To the jukebox bars you frequent.
The safest place to hide.
A long night spent with your most obvious weakness.
You start shaking at the thought.
You are everything I want.
'Cause you are everything I'm not.

And we lay, we lay together just not,
Too close, too close. (How close is close enough?)
We lay, we lay together just not,
Too close, too close.

I just wanna break you down so badly.
Well I trip over everything you say.
I just wanna break you down so badly.
In the worst way.

My inarticulate store bought hangover hobby kit.
It talks, it says, "You, oh, you are so cool."
Scissor shaped across the bed, you are red, violent red.
You hollow out my hungry eyes.
You hollow out my hungry eyes.

And we lay, we lay together just not,
Too close, too close. (How close is close enough?)
We lay, we lay together just not,
Too close, too close.

I just wanna break you down so badly.
Well I trip over everything you say.
Well I just wanna break you down so badly.
In the worst way.

I just wanna break you down so badly.
Well I trip over everything you say.
I just wanna break you down so badly.
In the worst way. (Worst way.)

I'm gonna make damn sure that you can't ever leave.
No, you won't ever get too far from me.
You won't ever get too far from me.
I'll make damn sure that you can't ever leave.
No, you won't ever get too far from me.
You won't ever get too far from me.
You won't ever get too far from me.
You won't ever get too far...

I just wanna break you down so badly.
Well I trip over everything you say.
Well I just wanna break you down so badly.
In the worst way. (Worst way.)

I'm gonna make damn sure.
I just wanna break you down so badly.
I just wanna break you down so badly. (Damn sure.)
In the worst way. (Worst way.)

2007-03-01T23:03:00.001+08:00

Seems like it was yesterday
When I saw your face
You told me how proud you were,
But I walked away
If only I knew what I know today
Ooh, ooh

I would hold you in my arms
I would take the pain away
Thank you for all you've done
Forgive all your mistakes
There's nothing I wouldn't do
To hear your voice again
Sometimes I wanna call you
But I know you won't be there

Oh, I'm sorry for blaming you
For everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself by hurting you

Some days I feel broke inside
But I won't admit
Sometimes I just wanna hide
'Cause it's you I miss
And it's so hard to say goodbye
When it comes to this, ooh

Would you tell me I was wrong?
Would you help understand?
Are you looking down upon me?
Are you proud of who I am?

There's nothing I wouldn't do
To have just one more chance
To look into your eyes
And see you looking back

Oh, I'm sorry for blaming you
For everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself, oh

If I had just one more day
I would tell you how much that I've missed you
Since you've been away
Ooh, it's dangerous
It's so out of line

I'm sorry for blaming you
For everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself..
By hurting you

2007-03-01T20:40:00.000+08:00

i feel so hurt,

do you know that?

2007-02-28T23:36:00.000+08:00

updates:

1. jan has cute hair

2. school is a total waste of time, i promise. well especially if you're not in class like three quarters of the time.

3. i played a few hours of mahjong today with my new mahjong clique (mummy, swenn, druce)

4. i need to stop buying cheap nail polish

5. i really really hate it when i go, shit my hand's itchy like at the back of my head and when i actually look at my hand, i see a little freaking ant on it.

jan came running to me during break today and she was like, remember zenn's i will stop talking and pay attention to my teacher thing you posted on your blog, i am supposed to write a hundred lines of "i will not skip chinese class anymore" in chinese now. tee hee.

i am craving for raspberries.

2007-02-26T19:03:00.000+08:00

TIME GRABS YOU BY THE WRIST AND

DIRECTS YOU WHERE TO GO

haha i was looking through old blog entries, like entries posted in 04 and i was laughing at my own entries. it seemed like 04 was such a long time ago. well it was because many things aren't the same anymore but considering the fact that it's only the start of 07, it was just a little while ago. haha it was pretty funny, being reminded of so many shit ass funny things which happened which somehow seem to have slipped away from my memory. just like how jan and i were trying to murder tiny mushrooms with this big knife once when we were making baked rice after school.

i smell dinner. haha i freaking slept right after lunch and now, i just woke up, just in time for dinner. pig? pig.

my sister is having tuition, hahaha her chinese tutor has a Really weird laugh! she's like roaring away and i can hear her from upstairs.

have you ever,

lost your wallet, in your own room?

or am i the only idiot in this world, hahaha.

2007-02-25T22:12:00.000+08:00

i'm lying awake, i'm missing you bad, i can't sleep.

2007-02-23T23:53:00.000+08:00

haha, that was how i spent my chinese new year. little kids have such cute cheeks. and, they were tearing my spongebob crap apart. my guitars were poor vicitms too. i was three so many years ago and now i feel as though a whole lifetime has past. well i certainly enjoy looking at them while they're at play, confidently having the world in their own hands. but gosh, they're really really really adorable, i promise. have you ever wondered, as a kid, how you'd look when you're 17? or how you'd be, the things you'd do? at 7, i would have never been able to picture the future like the way it is now. but now at 17, i can hardly remember daily life when i was 7. then again, 10 years, just 120 months, a little time really changes a lot of things huh? now, i wonder how life would be like when i'm 25.

now this, this was just totally hilarious. i found this on the dining table and i started laughing like an idiot. my brother is one, small joker.

2007-02-23T23:35:00.000+08:00

hello dearest tc, i've done the picture for the blog, it's all ready. i've the tagboard and i've tried making the layout. however, blogger has to freaking confuse the shit out of me, the new blogger shit really sucks and now i can't even enter the dumb, dumb dumb account because, well i don't even know what the hell went wrong. i, am, so, pissed off. the layout is halfdone and i might take another eight years to do the blog. haha shit i'm sorry

2007-02-22T15:32:00.000+08:00

It's not supposed to hurt this way

I need you I need you

More and more each day

2007-02-18T23:33:00.000+08:00

i don't know why i feel down today, well i don't think i'm pmsing or anything. i feel like stopping the world and sitting in a relatively, quiet, corner.

2007-02-17T01:26:00.000+08:00

I HAD A REALLY GREAT NIGHT

2007-02-16T15:30:00.000+08:00

why do i breathe in such constant disappointment?

that, was the studying process last year.

the result of it? we're all going to different schools. things almost never go your way.

2007-02-15T23:53:00.000+08:00

hello miss evening

i amuse myself. i really feel like changing my layout, again.

one week ago, the collecting of the results scared all hell out of me. my hands were just so weak and it was just shit scary. i remember, the day i sat for my first paper, i almost died of fear. it was scary because i knew that i was given total control of how the results would turn out. the journey to school last friday was also scary because i knew my fate had already been sealed.

art piece by zenn long, 9 years of age.

he never forgets my birthday, and he never forgets to make me a card which makes me so thankful to God for giving me him.

thank you everyone for you birthday wishes :) thank you for all the cards and flowers and everything! thank you for the flowers darling!

i love it when i listen to a new song and i totally fall in love with it. i love it when i find songs i like.

2007-02-09T00:09:00.000+08:00

OMG SHANN GO BANG YOUR HEAD AGAINST A TREE, YOU'RE GETTING BACK YOUR RESULTS LIKE TOMORROW.

OH DAMMIT I'M REALLY NOT A BRAVE GIRL.

2007-02-08T23:54:00.000+08:00

this is such a norm: my room is filled with shit of all kinds, bags, books, boxes, lots of food, you name it. i sit on the floor, right in the middle of that pile of junk, and stone for like all eternity.

everyone knows the Olevel results will be out tomorrow and thank you everyone for your well wishes, while i honestly don't know how to feel or know what to expect. the i-know-i-could-have-done-better and the i-wish-i-had-studied-harder regrets never seem to leave my life.

i'm a brave girl, i think.

2007-02-07T23:41:00.000+08:00

would you like me better on my knees?

qin has left. we were at the airport yet again today. it's kinda sad to have friends leaving one by one. well, we said our goodbyes with tearful eyes and hopeful see you soons.

well anyway, i had really great quality time with michelle and jan. bugis st for shopping and ikea for a reaaaaaaally nice filling dinner.

haha the snakes were freakingly on sale. we had quite a time at ikea! :D oh yes, damn that sprained ankle. (haha i fell down like a real loser)

why are all my favourite people going to be busy

2007-01-29T18:47:00.000+08:00

sexyback

haha okay i'm going to practise active blogging from now onwards. i just don't know why i can't seem to stop changing new layouts. lunch at crystal jade with the clique went pretty damn fine!

just like the old times, just like old times :)

haha i think everyone else was got so irritated with all 11 of us blocking the passage way, filling our memory cards with snapshots of smiles and hugs.

chinese new year is coming

the O level results are coming out soon.

and the countdown to 14 feb has already begun :D

i was at spotlight with jan the man and i really wish i could buy the whole store. okay the acoustic version of move along is playing and it sounds really, really weird.

i left a "will i always be your shannshine?" note in ru's pencil case when i dropped by her class the other day and yes she said i'll always be her shannshine :) haha it was a sec two thing we had, when it was practically impossible to separate us.

any takers for an ice cream spree?

2007-01-27T16:02:00.000+08:00

tomorrow would be the day that i would slap myself if i were to forget to bring my camera. i hope everyone would be able to make it tomorrow. i can't believe it's qin's turn to leave. and although we're all in the same jc, i hardly see any of my friends around, which totally, totally stinks.

all hail, the heartbreaker.

2007-01-24T17:40:00.000+08:00

i ended school at one and i just got up from a three hour nap. i hear voices.

my sister brought friends home and they're abusing the piano.

i miss running along those corridors in stnicks in that blue pinafore with all those really, really familiar faces.

2007-01-20T18:29:00.000+08:00

It's breathtaking to think of you

And to learn that sometimes

The only way out is through

It's mind-numbing to think of yesterday

I'd run to you now if I could

But things have changed

I heard you say

It's enlightening to think of the breeze

To believe in things that we can't see

So here we go

Lets show them how to live

Accept the pain

Always forgive

Watch the sun go down

Learn the sound by following all that's complete

i swear i love this song.

2007-01-17T23:00:00.000+08:00

THANK YOU FOR THE JELLY BEANS DEAREST

2007-01-16T20:34:00.000+08:00

go ahead tell me you'll leave again

you'll just come back running

and i'll take you for who you are

if you take me for everything

2007-01-14T22:05:00.000+08:00

Hey Dad,

I'm writing to you,

not to tell you that I still hate you.

Just to ask you how you feel

and how we fell apart,

how this fell apart.

Are you happy out there in this great wide world?

Do you think about your sons?

Do you miss your little girl?

When you lay your head down,

How do you sleep at night?

Do you even wonder if we're alright?

but we're alright,

We're alright.

Its been a long hard road without you by my side.

Why weren't you there all the nights that we cried?

You broke my mother's heart,

You broke your children for life.

Its not okay,but we're all right.

I remember the days you were a hero in my eyes,but

Those are just a long lost memory of mine.

I spent so many years learning how to survive,

now I'm writing just to let you know I'm still alive.

what a sad song?

2007-01-11T16:52:00.000+08:00

haha today was the first day of like lectures and i wasn't exactly in school. school has been getting better, but yeah as we can all agree, we miss stnicks and there's nothing like it. well starting jc is really like opening a new chapter of my life. it's time to start creating nice memories all over again. my new class is pretty damn funny. we were in class setting ground rules yesterday and now we have rules like:

no stomping of feet when angry

no snoring when sleeping

it totally cracked me up and now, there's this chinese song which is playing from my ipod. i don't know how the hell it got into my ipod, but it's kinda nice, hahaha. i think someone sent it to me a long time ago. it's nice because i really cannot understand a single line of what the guy is singing. it's just like classical music, no words spoken yet still emotional. haha you could be emo while listening to english, or, chinese songs. haha okay, i think it's time for my flu tab.

i was making egg drop soup just now and it's getting better, i promise!

i can't believe i'm turning 17 soon. and i think it's a good thing :)

You can count on me for life

Cause that's when I love you

When nothing you do could change my mind

The more I learn the more I love

The more my heart can't get enough

That's when I love you

When I love you no matter what

2007-01-08T23:48:00.000+08:00

updates:

i miss the food in stnicks

i had a haircut

i totally have to sleep before 12 now.

i've this new thing with pink chinese purses

my phones' keypad still sucks

i watched john tucker must die alone just now

i like egg drop soup

i like the blue cj shirt

i feel like i belong in neither school

i hope bio's not going to suck

my form teacher hates me already

i wish i had perfect eyesight

i think school should start at 8 instead

i like reader's digest

baby if you've got to go away, don't think i can take the pain.

2007-01-01T23:45:00.000+08:00

haha you know, i'll just blog when i feel like blogging.

2006-12-28T16:38:00.000+08:00

shann: hello?

cris: shann, can i sing for you.

cris: (sings)

cris: hmm where are you now?

shann: erm, i'm in the shower, haha.

cris: HAHAHAHAHA, and you still listened to me sing!

cris: you're such a loser shann.

shann: ...i thought you were depressed!

!!!

2006-12-26T00:57:00.000+08:00

merry, merry christmas.

wait, why are green and red christmas colours?

you know, there are some shows which are just not made to be watched the second time. i totally fell asleep while watching tokyo drift. haha well for me, there's nothing more comfortable than my bed.

christmas morning with the boy and the girls. cristal's strawgame was hilarious and a few rounds of mahjong proved, yet again, how much i suck at it. didn't join them for dinner but hey, christmas couldn't be better.

oh, JAN MICHELLE RU AND I ARE IN THE FREAKING SAME JC MAN.

things are looking pretty darn good, huh?

2006-12-22T21:36:00.000+08:00

nothing beats being with your favourite person,

great day, :)

2006-12-19T01:33:00.000+08:00

Yesterday you asked me something I thought you knew

So I told you with a smile

It's all about you

mummy :)

well nobody said you couldn't have a nice cup of coffee with one of your best friends miles away from home. this is eliza, and we're in freaking bannnnngkok :) oh yes, the gingerbread latte was fab.

technically, i'm enjoying myself. it's kinda nice to be in such a different environment, with pretty darn good food. then again, missing too many things holds you back from fully enjoying a nice holiday, right?

jingle bells, batman smells,

robin laid an egg.

i love the person who came up with that.

2006-12-17T20:01:00.000+08:00

i sat on an elephant today, (YAY) and i saw a baby one shit.

oh yes, haha three quarters and shoes are a no no, or you'll go out looking like an elf.

like this:

cute cute dogs!

2006-12-16T00:53:00.000+08:00

so, my mum just (finally) realised that i dyed my hair. haha it's not any obvious anyway.

mel and i were playing around with our nails some time back :D

hers

mine

hers

mine

see you in 8 days

2006-12-15T12:13:00.000+08:00

when morning comes

i was pretty down yesterday but the food really really really cheered me up. haha it was So good, i'm so happy now. and i'm desperate for a haircut, or maybe i'll wait after christmas.

swenn: "are you mad? i'd like to see you try walking to the toilet during a turblence with those heels."

there you go, some pictures from fishing.

THE CUTE LITTLE THING

"okay zenn, act cold and hungry"

there, the nice little service apartment we're staying at.

I used to know her brother

But I never knew I loved her

'Till the day she laid her eyes on me

Now I'm jumping up and down

She's the only one around

And she means every little thing to me

I've got your picture in my wallet

And your phone number to call it

And I miss you more, whenever I think about you

I've got your mix tape in my Walkman

Been so long since we've been talking

And in a few more days, we'll both hook up forever, and ever

2006-12-14T19:41:00.000+08:00

Awake, through the years it takes to see you.

Till I almost lose my mind.

Cause I'll never be alright,

And I'm sorry you had to see this.

But I'm such a mess,

And I never could forget.

I'm scared I'll miss the way we used to talk.

And if its all forever lost dont wanna know.

I'm scared that you're the one that got away.

And i want you here with me.

Tonight, will never come.

hello singapore, bangkok's good. and so i guess it's cj?

2006-12-13T02:01:00.000+08:00

seatbelts everyone?

fishing didn't go too well today, blame the rain. well anyway, it was really great taking the boat out, being out at sea again, with the nice waves and amazing breeze. i think the highlight of the day was the pufferfish. haha we caught three but we let them go. i swear it's really The cutey. (pictures/vids will be up when i'm not too lazy) i bought curry puffs for my dad at noon and i was practically running against time through heeren with a big bag of puffs looking like i just got out of bed.

i've finally started packing, i'll be only gone for roughly 10 days but sheesh it looks like i've packed for going away for a month. haha i can't help it, i dress according to my moods.

hey christmas shopping went really well yesterday, i managed to get everything i wanted, all thanks to my dear meatball dinahhhh. i can never ever have a peace of mind until i'm done with christmas shopping. so, easy to say, i'm brrroke. i can't believe the amount i splashed.

christmas is coming, yet again. each year is going by so fast i'm afraid i might just forget everything else that has happened before.

i am right now, at this moment, the happiest girl alive.

i don't want to leave you but i have to. i'll be waiting to fall into your arms again baby,

you're the best i've ever had.

2006-12-11T02:38:00.000+08:00

hello dearest, i miss you

You speak to me and

I know this will be temporary

You ask to leave,

but I can tell you that I've had enough

I can't take it

This welcome is gone and

I've waited long enough to make it

and if you're so strong

you might as well just do it alone

And I'll watch you go

Step up to me

I know that you've got something buried

I'll set you free

You set conditions,

but I've had enough

I can't take it

This welcome is gone and

I've waited long enough to make it

and if you're so strong

you might as well just do it alone

And I'll watch you go

Come back home, won't you come home?

You step in line, you got a lot to prove

It comes and goes

Yeah, it comes and goes

A step in time, yeah it's a lot to move

I know this will be temporary

I know this will be, but I've had enough

funny, i like this song.

2006-12-08T16:00:00.000+08:00

the fringe, monster.

haha you know, some things would never, ever change.

2006-12-08T01:15:00.000+08:00

i'm, sad.

2006-12-07T00:47:00.000+08:00

hush little baby, don't you cry.

haha why is that the closer you are to someone, the harder it is to buy a gift for that person. like for instance, my mum. i really have absolutely no idea what to get for her for christmas. no, the gift doesn't have to be perfect. yet i find it so easy to get something for someone i'm relatively not close to. (you could get anything) (really.)

now which is worse, knowing exactly what you want to buy but you know you can't spend that amount of cash or, going out with money but shopping disappoints the hell out of you and you can't find anything you like at all. taaaaha.

i, shann long am FEELING TOTALLY GUILTY ABOUT SHOPPING SO MUCH. I CAN'T BELIEVE MYSELF. I SHOP TOO MUCH. i need a slap.

last but not least,

happy happy birthday Jan!

i know that you know that i know that you know that i love you.

2006-12-05T18:53:00.001+08:00

adopt your own virtual pet!

2006-12-01T16:09:00.000+08:00

SO THIS IS ODD

haha yes i can't believe prom's over. haha i don't even know how i felt about prom, haha i wasn't even excited for it the day before or anything close. haha but it was a pretty sight seeing all your friends and classmates looking at their best :)

the hotel room was fab and we totally became pigs and ate a Lot of instant noodles. we pretty much talked through the night and well yeah, i'm really going to miss all this. i'm going to miss everything about stnicks. i'm going to miss saying i hate going to school. i'm going to miss seeing all my friends during recess and i hate coming to terms with the fact that all of us are going separate ways next year. it's funny and it's weird. i guess life is going to change, completely.

well here would be all i would have left of the old good times, along with all the fond memories engraved in my head:

for starters

there you go.

lisa, the natural ah lian aka head prefect of 2007

i'm going to miss martina SO MUCH, she's seriously the cutest thing on earth.

rachel, :) my absolutely darling fellow retard who's freaking like 170cm tall or sth

bi yan's like the monkey of the class. (she brought a really really cute bag i swear)

"mrs tan! let's take a picture"

"yes i must take with this one"

haha why am i called, this one.

mrs koh, the teacher who made maths so much more bearable for me.

presenting, the ah beng of the school. (the one and only)

"let's do the blur look"

rachel and i raised our brows.

i'm going to die without jan next year. and it'll be a really horrible death.

see, even bel could pull off a dress like that and she totally sizzled.

haha li ping takes care of me like a mother. (yay)

darling darling eliza who totally looked like a queen.

LOOK WHO'S BACK! :)

haha i still don't understand why i do these things to myself.

yes i'm sorry for being emo like, 23/7 haha. this was taken by jan the man by the way.

after prom! we were dying for foot massages.

the view for from the 55th floor ;)

the sunrise was perfect.

hahaha this, is cristal's shirt.

yes, forever and ever

and ever.

2006-11-26T22:43:00.000+08:00

will you still love me in the morning?

haha frankly speaking, i do not feel like blogging at all. the fat Os are over, prom's coming and ZENN HAS A FREAKING NO-SHANN-ALLOWED SIGN ON HIS DOOR BECAUSE I ARGUED WITH HIM.

i love my purple pair of specs. i'm pretty thankful the dreadful studying shit has come to an end. i used to hate knowing what i had to do. and yeah worse, doing what i had to do. i had a big long jolly list of things to do after the Os and now i just find myself delighting in going to bed without setting an alarm and waking up like midddday. my mind isn't too used to all this sudden freedom yet and i don't even have an excuse for not exercising anymore but i'm sure i'll love this life.

i can't believe i'm done with my Os. and yeah the Os would seem like nothing when the As come. well i'll always remember all these: checking my bag for my entry proof, ranting with jan at night on the phone, screaming at cambridge, just seated down staring at the clock, waiting for the paper to start knowning that only God could help me then, and i swear, i hated the history paper, every single bit piece and speck of it. i just hope i won't regret it in a few months time knowing how i could have thrown in more effort. yeah so why am i saying so much crap now, i can't change anything and when they're freaking in the midst of marking my papers.

haha anyway, i stand by the restorative power of sleep, a big, fat, YAY.

haha the last week has been pretty satisfying. i had lots and lots of ice cream, i caught more shows than i did in the last few months, i had a hell lot of fun swinging above the water in a cable car with eliza and manpin, enjoying the pretty darn pretty night view, i had quite a good deal of shopping and prom shopping went really Fine. ha, i think i'm going to look like a goth bride on wed.

I'M NOT READY TO LEAVE STNICKS YET BUT SHEESH I'M ON HOLIDAY, :)

CRISTAL LEE, TAKE CARE AND COME BACK SOON!

i love you friends

2006-11-05T13:17:00.000+08:00

they tell you what you need to know, they tell you who you need to be. aren't you tired of knowing what to do. aren't you tired of doing what you have to do. i'm standing on the edge of me. everything inside of me looks like everything i hate. 17th november is near, yet again so so far away. i need time to stop passing so fast and so intensely. i need to catch hold of myself, and breathe.

i hope everything happens for a reason.

2006-10-28T13:42:00.000+08:00

i'm going to play so hard after the 17th that i'll forget that i even sat for the Os.

2006-10-24T12:31:00.000+08:00

PLEASE, SLOW DOWN GIRL.

WE'RE MOVING WAY TOO FAST,

FOR THEIR WORLD.

2006-10-21T14:45:00.000+08:00

If I could say what I want to say

I'd say I want to blow you away

Be with you every night,

Am I squeezing you too tight?

What's wrong, with my tongue

These words keep slipping away

I stutter, I stumble.

Like I've got nothing to say

I'm feeling nervous

Trying to be so perfect

Cause I know you're worth it

You're worth it

2006-10-20T23:11:00.000+08:00

when you close your eyes, do you like what you see.

today was amazingly the last day of school. the terrible feeling of missing school kinda sinks in and out. like one moment i'd feel really sad about it and the next i'd realised that i didn't register the fact that it's time for us to leave the school.

lovely, isn't it.

bye bye

eliza and i look like a freaking lesbian couple here.

jan dearest. through thick and thin.

char, the one and only history partner.

and, she pretty much helps to kill the boredom too :D

i likkkke this shot. hahaha they look like F4.

2006-10-18T11:28:00.000+08:00

haha there! for the most demanding of all. haha well of course miss lin was nice enough to upload all the pictures :)

now i can't imagine school next year without jan anymore :( no orange bowl, no nothing.

ps: take note of the weird hand which is holding a knife against me. (courtesy of Ru Eng.)

2006-10-17T15:24:00.000+08:00

this is ru. she irritates you like 98% of the time. as for the remaining 2%, she'd be either sleeping or eating.

i can't emphasize further, i love my friends. and the lights are so damn pretty.

hahaha spot the odd one out. (hint: ru's wearing white)

hahahaha, :) !

haha you'd love her anyway.

i think michelle's the cutest thing. haha

the virgin slut alliance (2004)

a big fat AW. haha the only two in the clique who wear ties to school.

2006-10-16T18:01:00.000+08:00

it's really good to hear your voice, saying my name, it sounds so sweet.

I DON'T WANT TO GO TO SCHOOL TOMORROW. haha it's giving me nightmares. i had the most frightening dream last night. it was so bloody, painful and haunting. it was so saw 2 like. and the haze was so bad today. it feels like i'm living on a cloud.

okay i can smell dinner already, i likkkke curry. i had an awesome time on friday night with my favourite girls :) and of course i love lamb. michelle's crayfish, fong's lobster, qin's chicken, ru's porkchop (which killed her braces) were all oh so good. we're Such cam whores, really haha. but it was definitely a fun night out. a big yay.

i'll pour acid all over the lab tomorrow if i screw up my practical.

don't you wish you had so much time to waste now. and that you wouldn't feel guilty when you do so. my list of things-t- do-after-the-Os is bursting.

2006-10-15T19:29:00.000+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY RULY

HAPPY BIRTHDAY WINNY

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MIMI

LOVE YOU ALL!

2006-10-15T19:21:00.000+08:00

Lets try to remember these days back in December

Our lives were very different

I was lonely when we first met

A small upstairs apartment

Driving through the darkness to get back home

Before they knew you were even gone

Please, slow down, girl

We're moving way too fast for their world

We've gotta make this last

I miss you so much, a self-inflicted coma

The days drag on I never thought of running with their feet

And when i feel the stress, I'm lonely and depressed

I picture you in the dress you wore four weeks ago

You don't have to speak because I can hear your heartbeat

Fluttering like butterflies searching for a drink

You don't have to cover up how you feel when you're in love

I'll always know I'm not enough to even make you think

2006-10-10T21:32:00.000+08:00

(On the weekends, we try to get our share of excitement and of fresh air. Trying to forget: who we're gonna be, when the alarm rings on monday morning.)

would it be considered suicide if i were to walk in a carpark and let a car hit me instead of avoiding it when it comes my way. would i still be able to go to heaven then. i didn't kill myself, the car did. i just didn't walk fast enough. i could just picture myself being run down by a car because i was listening to music and didn't hear it approaching. i think the more uninteresting my life gets, the more morbid my thoughts become.

i'm worried for myself. i can't listen in class anymore. i can't do work anymore. i don't even feel like sleeping at night. well here's the best part, it's not like i'm working my ass off or anything. i'm just more or less detaching myself from life.

i had quite a nice talk with eliza today, which also means i totally killed the lit period which was supposed to help me pull up my f-ing lit grade. but anyway, thank you friend. sincere concern, and patience are just what i need. it's amazing how those close to you can actually notice the heavy smile that you are trying to carry.

i don't care if i eat a billion slices of pizza or finish tubs and tubs of ice cream, they comfort me. i'd rather die a fat ass bitch who spent her life enjoying food than someone who married salad.

my mum was right,

i do play the piano when i'm sad.

2006-10-07T12:59:00.000+08:00

haha screw the last post. haha besides being a really ugly post, i can't stand entries which are written in one chunk without paragraphs. i'd always be too lazy to read. i hate it when i whine, it makes me feel very unproductive and dumb right after.
it's too cold to have the aircon on when i study but it's too warm without it so darn, i have yet to find a nice balance. haha well at least i have weird jackets to fix the freezing-in-my-own-room part, haha i think jan knows that.

haha you know what, i find blogging really boring and predictable. maybe i should start using livejournal like what jan said, so at least i would find some thrill in locking some entries. i'm still feeling so sore about my computer because i have so many songs to put into my nano but i c-a-n-t possibly do that now with a dead computer. i think i'm addicted to music, haha like really really. i listen to music when i'm bored, i listen to music when i'm sad, happy, angry. i listen to music to fill the silence, i use music to express how i feel, i freaking listen to so much music. so you can imagine how much i'd like to slap something when the battery bar turns red.

hahahaha i just noticed this slip of paper pasted onto my mum's desk.
" you were
snoring
sleeping at
swenn's
Good night"

hahaha my brother sleeps with my mum when my dad's overseas.

anddd, i'm so going to write in to Nokia. i don't think it takes 5 weeks to repair a damned phone.

oh yes, my fringe has officially stopped growing.

2006-10-05T17:30:00.000+08:00

sometimes i wish i could be in a place where i didn't have to answer to anyone. where i'd just be alone, with only the soft breeze as company. i really appreciate time alone. sometimes i don't know how to talk to the people around me. sometimes, i just close my eyes and imagine i am not there. sometimes, i don't know who i really am and i don't know what are the true limits to my abilities. i'm afraid that i'm pushing myself too hard, at the same time, i'm also afraid that i'd regret not doing so. who decides who does well? and is it true that every student is capable of getting a string of As? it is always so tempting to fall into the i'm not going to make it so why try pit. so what happens if i don't make it?

2006-10-01T19:48:00.000+08:00

Although you're sleeping right next to me. Well, it feels like you are wide awake in a distant dream. Leading a life that is finally free: of these endless nights and countless fights that turn us into who we hate to be.

i really like this song. haha i've been busy trying to console myself: that the prelims, are just, the prelims. and you know what, Damn the prelims. f, f, f.

i managed to go down to candy empire today. i got my jelly beans so screw everything else, i'm happy.

haha i don't know what i want to do when i get older. and it feels so freaking weird to be so ambition-less.

2006-09-27T21:59:00.000+08:00

i'm really getting sort of immuned to motivational talks. haha i'm so tired of them trying to break me i guess and i think i'm just very very drained, physically, mentally, emotionally. i mean it's hard to manage some workshop thing one day after your prelims. haha while i felt kinda bad because i was so detached from the programme, i simply refused to cry. well, the Os are coming like in a months' time, i don't have much time to whine anymore.

anyway, i had quite a time shopping with jan yesterday. i didn't manage to buy much but it did allow me to get a good breather. it was really nice. haha there were stnicks girls everywhere, at least the sec fours. and i think cab fares have gone mad. i took a cab from town to the pines which was like say five mins away and it cost me ten bucks. haha it was not only because of the jam but also the extra charges and all that shit.

i'm going to take a nnnice nap. i know how to pamper myself so well. dinner was great and i'm having a terrible craving for ice cream, :)

(the house phone rings and zenn picks it up)

zenn: (to my dad) your ex girlfriend's on the line

dad: who?

zenn: ...mummy.

2006-09-24T21:42:00.000+08:00

"I drive myself crazy, wanting you the way that i do."

2006-09-24T00:57:00.000+08:00

It's like you and I don't even try to get along. Like the two of us together are wrong. It's like you and I can't let the good make up for the bad. Guess we can't go back to what we once had. Don't care bout what I said. Just care bout what I've done. Though years have come and gone. You know you're still the one. I love what's left of you, and miss what now is gone. Guess the only thing we've done is moved on.

nice song, really sad song.

2006-09-23T19:04:00.000+08:00

2006-09-22T23:36:00.000+08:00

today = happy day

2006-09-21T23:15:00.000+08:00

this Is The prelims:

that, i have to constantly remind myself.

lunch with ru bel jan mich qin gwen. fong joined us during the later part and we caught john tucker must die. haha it's quite a corny show but i kinda like it. she's a pretttty girl too. haha during the show, jan was commenting on how it was nice to just turn to your side and see all your friends sitting in a row. then i turned to my side, i looked at the row of smiling faces and hey i couldn't agree more. we took a couple of shots today and although we looked as if the books had killed us, they were lovely. while spending time with them today, it occured to me how much i missed spending time with them. now i cannot imagine life after secondary school: when we'd all be torn apart when we go our separate ways. no doubt about that.

i watched the notebook just now and boyyyy did i cry hahaha. i am Such a sucker for such shows.

When breathing just passes the time,

Until we all just get old and die.

Now talking's just a waste of breath,

And living's just a waste of death.

And why put a new address on the same old lonliness?

And this is you and me and me and you until we've got nothing left.

2006-09-20T14:41:00.000+08:00

"Hey there Delilah, What's it like in New York City? I'm a thousand miles away, But girl tonight you look so pretty, Yes you do, Time Square can't shine as bright as you, I swear it's true. "

haha i remember jan and i saying that we'd marry anyone who would write and sing a song like that to us, haha.

"Hey there Delilah, I've got so much left to say, If every simple song I wrote to you, Would take your breath away, I'd write it all, Even more in love with me you'd fall, We'd have it all. "

ohhh yes i would

2006-09-16T19:51:00.000+08:00

haha you know, when you pray to the Lord to ask him to help you sit your ass down and study, He Really helps. haha other than being more motivated to lock yourself at home, my precious computer died, (and it took ALL MY SONGS AND PICTURES ALONG WITH IT) and, while packing my room, in hopes of making it a neater and a more comfortable place to survive in, i wonderfully misplaced my remote control. haha which also means, i've packed my remote control somewhere neatly in my room and i have no idea where it is. haha i'm sure i packed it somewhere because i saw it just before i started packing. i amaze myself.

zenn: what is red, stupid and called fred?

me: erm fred

zenn: how did you know?!!

me: (speechless)

haha zenn makes me miss being nine years old.

oh yes, dearest jan, i just realised that you still have my jacket. haha all the best for physics on monday yes.

off to hit the books,

haha

2006-09-10T13:39:00.000+08:00

Maybe one day we'll wake up and this will all just be a dream

2006-09-01T14:18:00.000+08:00

chocolate therapy always works.

i've not been online for ages and i don't think i'm going to be for a long time. haha besides the fact that my comp's brain dead or something, my prelims have already started annnddddd it's freaking me out like shit.

happy teacher's day,

i feel like going back to bed.

2006-08-25T23:31:00.000+08:00

tonight was just enough for me to fall in love with you,
all over again.

2006-08-23T19:33:00.000+08:00

heavy rain
by twice shy

this will look pretty beside a war scene
but so trivial, so trivial.
this is all in good time
you say i cause my own wounds,
i say i'm afraid of the blade.
you're foreign,
to these tears, sealed and wasted.
how long would it take to cure this?

say you love me,
say it slow, mean it.
let me and old memories meet.

this will leave a stain on that pretty blouse you bought
blemished, carelessly seized.
this is all in good time
i never taught you to read in between my lines,
i wish it could be easy.
i'm blunt, i sting,
but these words are too brittle.
how long would it take to cure this?

say you love me,
say it slow, mean it.
let me and old memories meet

say you love me,
say it slow,
say it well,
let me and old memories meet,
smile as you say it.

2006-08-23T18:04:00.000+08:00

if i lay here, if i just lay here, would you lie with me, and just forget the world.

2006-08-17T18:44:00.000+08:00

trouble sleeping

haha i love the way i'm always convincing myself that i deserve time off from studying. haha besides failing history (because i only wrote 2 paragraphs) and screwing up the amaths test today, it has been quite a satisfying day.

four unity kicks ass at breaking stuff in the chem lab haha. it was a pretty funny sight, to see eliza and gang trying to mop the floor after one of them broke a bottle of sulphuric acid, or from what i heard, wanxin spilling (corrosive) concentrated hydrochloric acid onto herself, and rachel only watching and letting a test tube filled with KI roll down her pinafore before breaking into bits and pieces after hitting the floor because her both hands were holding two more test tubes. and i Hate testing for oxygen because my glowing splints don't ever seem to rekindle.

13 DAYS TO PRELIMS,

haha am i freaked out, you bet i am.

2006-08-15T18:09:00.000+08:00

for you i will

haha please excuse the last few entries. sometimes i hate myself for being so damn emo. well sitting on the terrace while enjoying the cool breeze and listening to your favourite sad songs somehow cheers you up. i love the view from the terrace, i like looking at the world from a distance.

well aside, we had our social studies mock thing today. i didn't even bother attempting the structured questions, i ended up reading the joy luck club. then, i realised that i've never really read most of the parts from my literature text. i'll say, it's a really good book. i had quite a time talking and laughing like a chicken with eliza manpin and rachel. haha the Os really kill the mood but hey there are always things to look forward for, like say prom night. i'd say we've more or less planned out what we're going to do right after our last paper til prom night.

i was looking through pictures of me when i was young. haha actually, i don't exactly think i've changed much, haha from what most people call fat shit or what my cousin called me, fat thingy. then, i realised that i've not taken pictures for a long time. blame the exams but all the time i have now, which is supposed to be used for preparing for that shit Os is all the time i have left in secondary school. so once i'm done preparing, done with the Os, yes i'd be able to drop everything, but i'll never be able to go back to school, secondary school at least. haha unless i screw up really badly of course.

haha we've so many tests that i don't bother writing the dates down anymore. in fact, i've misplaced my organiser.

haha do you know what i think, i think sleeping is the most rewarding thing i could do now and like feel the least guilty about. i, love sleeping.

i want, to go to the beach to catch the sunrise.

2006-08-14T15:10:00.000+08:00

I'm sittin' here all by myself
just tryin' to think of something to do
Tryin' to think of something, anything
just to keep me from thinking of you
But you know it's not working out
'cause you're all that's on my mind
One thought of you is all it takes
to leave the rest of the world behind

Well I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did
And I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did
And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did
And you didn't mean to love me back/but I know you did

I'm sittin' here tryin' to convince myself
that you're not the one for me
But the more I think, the less I believe it
and the more I want you here with me
You know the holidays are coming up
I don't want to spend them alone
MEMORIES OF CHRISTMAS TIME WITH YOU
WILL JUST KILL ME IF I'M ON MY OWN,

Well I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did
And I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did
And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did
And you didn't mean to love me back

I know it's not the smartest thing to do
we just can't seem to get it right
But what I wouldn't give to have one more chance tonight (one more chance tonight)

I'm sittin' here tryin' to entertain myself with this old guitar
But with all my inspiration gone it's not gettin' me very far
I look around my room and everything I see reminds me of you
Oh please, baby won't you take my hand
we've got nothing left to prove

Well I didn't mean for this to go as far as it did
And I didn't mean to get so close and share what we did
And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did
And you didn't mean to love me back, but I know you did
And I didn't mean to meet you then we were just kids
And I didn't mean to give you chills the way that I kiss
And I didn't mean to fall in love, but I did
And you didn't mean to love me back but I know you did
Don't say you didn't love me back 'cause you know you did
No, you didn't mean to love me back
But you did

2006-08-13T18:08:00.000+08:00

And we wait above a road.
We're turning to go home.
And the silence from the side of the car,
Tells me everything and how we are.
Cause there's no more trying to make this alright.
Theres no more trying tonight.
And you know it's not so easy when you're all alone,
And I wonder if, I'm alone in your head.
I know something is wrong,
I just don't know what to do.
You say it's only me, and, that I'm so perfect for you.
I don't want to try no more,
I don't want to make this right.
I just want you to be true to me one time.
And you know it's not so easy when you're all alone,
And I wonder if I'm alone in your head.
Twelve days gone by, since I have saw you last,
I'll give this one more try,
I'll give it all my best, and, I'll ask
What could you be doing that is so much fun?
Without me by your side,
Without me by your side.
And, I will take a step back, and, I'll let you ahead,
And, I will take a step away, and, see if you come back,
Because there's no more trying to make this alright,
Theres no more trying,
Theres no more trying tonight.
We will never be the same,
We will never be the same,
We will never be the same,
We will never be the same,
Until you're done.

2006-08-09T23:43:00.000+08:00

HAIL BIO, YOU FAT BITCH.

haha the more i study, the more i think i talk to myself.

2006-08-08T13:23:00.000+08:00

scream if you wanna go faster

haha today is tuesday. well don't ask why i didn't go to school today. (i adore getting up at close to 1)

the other day during english, mrs sng asked whether my name was an english name or a chinese name. haha do you know something, i don't know! haha well actually, i won't even call it a name. but from what i know, "long" is a pretty darn hard surname to match. i was actually supposed to be called dawn. dawnnn long. so, i figured that my name is a chinese-derived english name, like it suddenly popped out from my dad's head, shann. and hahaha i went to google and searched for shann. apparently, it's some band's name. i likkke.

okay enough of bull, i'm sleepy again haha

2006-08-06T22:15:00.000+08:00

why am i not surprised your children don't open up. it looks like you have everything, but it feels like you have nothing. tell me, what is the point of everything, other than bringing out the worst in each other. the two people every kid should respect the most, sometimes that respect just kills itself, instantly. i sat by the poolside today. the sun was gentle and the breeze was comforting. it's really something different when you just stop, and watch the world go by. i saw little girls running around the pool, with such confidence, without a single care in the world. when was the last time you ran like that?

well you'd like to think that your were invincible.

yeah, well weren't we all once, before we felt lost for the first time?

well this is the last time.

- this brilliant dance, dashboard confessional.

or maybe some luck is on my side, when i went to the terrace to try to read through ss for the test tomorrow, i received a msg saying "the ss test is cancelled" soon after i opened my book. now, i like things like that.

maybe, it's better not to care about anything at all.

2006-08-03T22:00:00.000+08:00

Here in this diary

I write you visions of my summer

It was the best I ever had

There were choruses and sing alongs

And that unspoken feeling of knowing

That right now is all that matters
All the nights we stayed up talking

Listening to 80's songs

And quoting lines from all those movies that we love

It still brings a smile to my face

i really wish i had perfect eyesight. haha lenses are such a damned chore. well anyway, i just came back from dinner, meatballls, ha. oh yes i caught the lakehouse with michelle and jan today. i seriously love the show. she has really nice eyes and he's like the sweetest shit ever. shows like that really kill me haha.

don't you love days like these. if you ask me, i'm pretty darn happy with my life, well excluding my mad olevel race. things will always get better. even when you're at your lowest, because that's when the tide's just about to change.

i love my darling and i love my friends. i'm a happy girl.

and yes, i miss my parents, who are overseas, haha attending a wedding.

2006-07-29T14:28:00.000+08:00

drink down that gin

i am so going to get my ass kicked in a few months time. haha okay no, weeks. the way time is flying, it's just, scary. i need like chocolate therapy, haha.

oh, haha do you know that we talk to ourselves about an average of 60,000 times a day. i wonder what i tell myself.

chicken rice with black sauce, light sauce, chilli and ginger. hahaha i might as well not call it chicken rice. i still want my tacobell though.

haha now i'm trying to figure out whether last night's dream did happen. i can't stand the fact that dreams are so, life-like.

conclusion, blogging = throwing junk online

2006-07-26T22:19:00.000+08:00

do you know what stinks:
trying to push yourself in a particular direction so hard and losing yourself in the midst of it. when all hell suddenly breaks loose and you find that you no longer know where you're heading or better, you have your destination in mind but you don't know how to get there. rewind, rewind. there are just so many things that you regret. but now i wish i could just fast forward everything. then again, who really wants to grow up.

maybe now i know why i like making layouts. i made this purple shit today. the layouts aren't the best or the most elaborated or the prettiest but i like the fact that it makes me happy when i complete one. or like playing guitar, all for just my ears. i never fail to provide such cheap thrill for myself.

i love saturday mornings.

2006-07-26T17:23:00.000+08:00

A subdued silence undisturbed by the sound of her breath.
So carefully, brush her hair back from her eyes
In steady sequence, one by one.
She slips away.

So close your eyes and sleep to dream.
I'm by your side.
No words to speak.
We'll set our course and make it through.
No matter how far I go my heart remains with you.

And I'm not sure what I'm looking for.
But it's clear to see the purpose of my exsistance Is laying here in front of me.

So close your eyes and sleep to dream.
I'm by your side.
No words to speak.
We'll set our course and make it through.
No matter how far I go

And if all else fails you can look up at the sky
Because it's the same one that shines above you and I.
And if all else fails you can close your eyes
And I'll be right beside you.
I'll be the one by your side.

So close your eyes and sleep to dream.
I'm by your side.
No words to speak.
We'll set our course and make it through.
No matter how far I go
No matter how much this hurts
I wanted you to know,
My heart remains with you.

Round, Round.

2006-07-24T20:41:00.000+08:00

i like it better now.